Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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