i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
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I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
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