i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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