Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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