Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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