he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
