Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
