Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
