do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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