Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
