playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
