He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
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He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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