dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize