Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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