4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
id be glad to
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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