So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
