Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
i believe in u and ur pee
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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