it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
