so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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