I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
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Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
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I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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