i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
