I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize