this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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