i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Randomize