We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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