break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
she peed on how many people?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
