I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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