so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Randomize
