she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize