I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize