Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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