whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
