PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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