Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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