even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
