i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
