I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize