so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
