so that wasnt chicken after all
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
