I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
