I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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