I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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