I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Randomize
