The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
