i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
