Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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