I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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