Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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