I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize