why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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