thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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